- Trichotillomania
- Interviews
Melanie's interview
How did all start?
It was the end of my freshman year of high school. I was taking the AP US History exam and it was my first AP class. I was unprepared for the exam and extremely stressed out. I'd never tried hard in school before high school and still got excellent grades. The thought of not succeeding scared me. I remember hardly knowing anything on the exam. I don't remember much of the exam itself. All I remember is leaving the exam and realizing that half my eyebrow was missing.
Do you already have a diagnosis? How long did it take you to get it?
I have a diagnosis. I self-diagnosed myself in April 2015, after reading a Buzzfeed article about a 16 year old girl with trich. I was 16 at the time, and after research, I realized that I also had trich, although my symptoms were far less severe. I approached my mother about it and was told that I was being dramatic. I never brought it up again until after my official diagnosis. Due to my shame, I wasn't officially diagnosed until the end of my junior year of high school. I'd been seeing my therapist for unrelated reasons for roughly a year, but had been afraid to mention it until then. Once I told her, she told me she'd known I had trich since she first met me, she just wanted me to be able to admit it myself.
For what medical specialties have you been treated? What has been the most useful specialty for your?
I've seen a therapist since my sophomore year of high school. I originally went for reasons unrelated to trich and didn't mention that I thought I had it until a year after I began treatment. Not long after she diagnosed me I stopped going to therapy. I'd been self-managing fairly well and didn't feel a need to go any longer. However, therapy was very helpful for me.
What has been the most useful thing for you so far?
Learning my triggers has been the most useful thing for me. It allows me to be proactive and take necessary steps to hopefully prevent myself from pulling.
What have been your biggest difficulties?
Learning how to manage my trich on my own. Since I wasn't diagnosed for two years after I first showed symptoms, and I didn't know what it was for a year after I first showed symptoms, I had to manage it on my own. It's a lot harder to control impulses and recognize pulling without knowing what the problem is. Once I realized I most likely had trich, it became a lot easier to manage my symptoms, because I was able to research the condition.
How has your social and family environment reacted? Have your social or family relationships changed?
My mother originally shut me down when I mentioned to her I thought I had trich. That made me unwilling to tell anyone for years. When I finally told my therapist and she diagnosed me, I decided to tell my parents after all. They were very concerned for me, and they try to help me with it. They don't know how though and often make it worse. I'm not sure either of them have ever researched it beyond what I've told them, which I find frustrating. My relationship with them hasn't changed much though. The only people besides them who know are my two best friends, and it hasn't changed my relationship with either of them.
Finally, what advice would you give to a person in a similar situation?
I always thought telling my parents would be the best thing to do since they're always so supportive of me. I wasn't afraid to tell them because I know they believe that mental illnesses are real. I wish I'd waited to tell them though. I should've taken the time to learn about trich on my own and discuss the issue of telling them with my therapist. I think in the long run it would've been more beneficial to hold off on telling them immediately after my diagnosis.
