Working on derm

I have been doing this for at least 35 years. It is difficult and hurts self esteem. I believe mine is based from emotional and sexual abuse that left me searching for relief as a child and somehow this is what I came up with. I was always " wound up" and recently realized that this is not just me, but anxiety I have always had. I had a couple of situations in life that sent me spiraling into a depression I had never known. This has made me re analyze my life and seek answers and help. Working on me and trying to find my worth again. ..